Conjoined To Death

Chapter 5: Always Together

It happened.

It’s real.

It’s real and it finally happened.

Our surgery went quite well.

We found a professional doctor quickly. The doctor was really patient with us. We were provided with physical and mental care throughout the surgery. Luckily, money wasn’t an issue either. Our insurance covered it. And we ended up in a presentable hospital. It’s as if the universe that always worked against us decided to switch teams at the last minute and played in our favor. Everything happened so quickly. Everything was so easy. Everything felt great and right and exactly where it was supposed to be for once.

And finally, freedom didn’t seem so far away. It was like I almost touched it.

Almost.

I tried not to think about the ugly argument I had with Joy and Hardy. Joy crying. Hardy looking as though he is ready to kill me. And oh god, I knew he might. “I’m gonna be me, after years,” was the only thought keeping guilt away from eating me alive. Mom would’ve killed us all. But it didn’t matter now. She’s dead. Once she saw that we were all in great shape, she’ll change her mind anyway. It’s not like she’d disown us.

I woke up in a hospital bed. And to my right lies another two beds. We were in three separate beds. The room is unusually cold. Joy and Hardy. I walked up. I walked. Alone and steady. Well, not so steady, but I did it alone. It’s new. It’s refreshing. It feels as if I could fly. It’s the tiniest fraction of freedom that I waited for it for years. “Joy and Hardy wake up. We made it,”. I struggled a bit while moving, I used Joy’s bed as support. “I could skip formal family meetings freely now. Hardy, you could go to whichever college you like, it’s not too late. Joy, you could train, do your bachelor’s, and whichever productive life you wanted to live-,” Ouch. I fell. Walking alone didn’t seem that hard. I’m still holding onto Joy’s bed. Why the hell aren’t they waking up?

Crk, crk, crk. The door opened and what looked like a nurse entered. “Miss Hope, you’re alive,” holding her hands up to her cheek she said. Slap. My knocked eyebrow displayed my confusion. “What do you mean?”. “Oh Miss Hope,” she’s looking so relieved, her hand up to her heart. “you being here is a miracle! You see, the implants the hospital was supposed to give you and your siblings, one nurse mistakenly stored them at the wrong temperature. Essentially lowering the chance of the surgery succession by 30%,” Slap. She didn’t stop there. “And-“. “Stop” but I stopped her. “Stop right there, what exactly happened to my siblings?”. She looked mortified, then her eyes turned into those of pity. Oh, how much do I recognize those pity eyes, the same ones that looked at me my whole life. “The hospital didn’t just stay silent! We fired that careless nurse and will offer money to charity on behalf of you and your siblings. Well, we would’ve, but now you’re alive so things might change-“. “What happened to my siblings?” I asked more firmly this time. “We tried our best, Miss Hope, but some things just aren’t meant to be. Please try to understand,”. I lost it on her. “Understand what?! What is going on with my siblings?”. She was taken aback, scared. She looked down and said, “I’m so sorry for your loss”. The final blow.

No

No no no no no no

Please no

But it was too late. I already knew the answer, even before it was given. It was clear since the first time they didn’t answer me. I guess triplets feel each other.

I was crying before I realized it. Through my tears, I ask, “How is Joy dead? She had the majority of both organs,”. I saw the nurse trying to approach me from the corner of my eye. But she decided not to in the end. She coughed and said, “Well, what happened is the organs we implanted failed halfway through the surgery. Hardy is born with one kidney as you know, so he was in extreme danger. It was a mess before the doctor announced that we will take emergency organs from patient Joy herself. It is claimed that Miss Joy secretly wrote the doctor an email, basically a will, stating that if anything unexpected happened to the original implanted organs, the doctor is allowed to use Joy’s organ and give it to her siblings, Hope and Hardy,”. Joy, stupid careless Joy. Thinking she has nine lives. Why Joy? Why did you ever think that our lives mattered more than yours? “So we did that, we tried taking Joy’s heart and kidney,” the nurse continued. “but Hardy couldn’t survive long without any kidney. And you, Miss Hope, well. We implanted the heart just a second before our devices declared you dead. Well, you’re not! and that’s awesome! Miss, it might be hard to adjust at first, but we won’t leave you alone. I’ll call the doctor quickly, hang in there,” she left.

And just like that, my world ended. I can’t accept it. No, this isn’t my life. This is some sick nightmare. “Joy,” I touched her freezing hand. And suddenly, it made sense why the room was that cold. “Hardy, please wake up. It cannot end like that. We don’t deserve it to end like that. Please wake up. I’m sorry, this is all my fault. I’ll die instead, but please wake up. I need you two. I need my siblings,” my loud cries echoed through the entire room. It was useless. No matter how much I cry or beg or try to seal a deal with the devil to take me instead, they’re never coming back. They’ll be underground feet away from me. They’ll turn into ashes. Because of me. You’re free now Hope, alive. At what cost though?

Pain. My heart is raging with pain. Physical pain. I turn around searching for the nurse. She’s gone. Stop. My heart stopped beating for a second, I felt it. My skin came harshly into contact with the cold, hard floor. I tried holding onto Joy’s hand, but she wasn’t alive to hold onto mine. “No, I mustn’t die like this. Not now. Give me some more time,”. It was of no use. Our heart is refusing to support me. As if the heart that once belonged to two refused to beat for one to live now.

“Some people are born for each other. They’re soulmates. Their life is completed once they complete each other. All their experiences, everyone they knew, all their pain and patience and confusion lead them to end up in each other’s arms. Their pasts are intertwined. They search all over the world for each other,”

That was what our mom used to say. I was lucky, so lucky to be born right between my soulmates. And I was ignorant, so ignorant not to hold onto them.

I’m dying. My soul is leaving and I can feel it. The body that carried 3 heads can’t carry 1 now. My Soul is leaving to find my siblings’ souls in heaven. So that we can be together forever. So we can be conjoined till death.